Tuesday, January 16, 2007
napakalabo talaga nia.. ewan ko ba.. kung kelan sobrang nag gigive up na ko sa kanya, saka nman siya gagawa ng dahilan para umasa ako at hindi mag give up... para siyang bahay na merong thermostat, na kapag nag iincrease o nag dedecrease ang hope level ko sa optimum level, meron siyang ginagawang effect para maibalik sa normal.. kumbaga sa body processes siya ay homeostasis.. he maintains the normal hope level of kleveleine.. arrrghh!!! masisira ang ulo ko dito sa kakaisip!
last night was monday - taekwondo night.. andun xa syempre.. pagdating ko umupo ako sa tapat nila ni epal dahil nagtuturo sila ng mga juniors.. nag "hi" saken si epal tpos tumingin din si peterpen at xmpre nag "hi" ren... nung lesson, hindi ko sinasadyang maging ka-row siya, hence, siya ay naging ka-group ko sa warm up exercise.. after my turn, nung pabalik na ako ng line, parang nag-ooffer siya saken ng "hi-5" but i ran to the opposite side so siya nman parang napahiya kaya binaba nlang nia ung hand nia.. after his turn, he stood by me and talked to me.. napaka bango nga nia eh kahit pawisin.. super turn on.. nag usap kami na parang normal lang.. na parang walang nangyari.. after the warm up, pinagawa kami ng maraming exercises.. first stop, sparring.. sabi "pair off with a partner".. nakatingin siya saken pero lumingon ako sa iba so lumapit si emma saken at siya nlang nging partner ko.. then after nung first round ng sparring sbi mkpagpartner nman daw sa iba.. tumingin ako sknya, nkitingin ulit sya skn pero katabi ko si zeb kaya siya nlang naging partner ko.. third time, lumapit na talaga siya skn... i saw him walking towards me so tumingin ulit ako sa iba, pero he shouted "klev!" kaya eun.. kami naging mag partner.. nagsparring kami, and this time around, nag ingat na ako para hindi ko siya matamaan "dun sa masakit".. haha kasi twice ko na siya natatamaan "dun sa masakit" eh LOL.. after sparring, break.. he talked to me.. then next exercise needed a group of 3.. nakita ko si epal at si peterpen parehong nakatingin skn.. since magkatabi na sila, niyaya ni epal si peterpen para maging ka-group.. then tinawag nila ko as in they shouted "klev! come with us!".. palapit na ako pero lumapit sknila si sam na wala pang ka-group.. so umalis nalang ulit ako at naghanap ng ibang group.. unexpetedly, pinaalis nila si sam at tinawag ulit nila ako para magjoin sa group nila.. flattered naman ako hehe... ang cute nga nung exercise nmen eh, nagkukulitan nnman kami ni peterpen at parang na-out-of-place nnmam si epal haha.. then we did some technical stuff and line works.. after that, nagpatterns kami.. pinauna ung first two rows na magperform ng pattern.. i was at the back so i talked to emma whilst waiting for my turn.. pero at the same time i was watching him perform his pattern and i was just gob-smacked.. as usual, i admired him for being sooo amazing.. after their turn, lumapit siya skn and he talked to me.. i didnt notice emma go and mr. houston say that we should do our patterns.. syempre dahil na kay peterpen ung buong focus ko hehe... whilst we were talking, lumapit si mr houston at tinanong kng bakit hindi ako nagpapattern haha!! i just kinda ignored him and carried on talking to peterpen.. we were talking about how gay epal was.. haha.. sabi ni peterpen ang sama daw ng tingin ni epal sakanya.. sabi ko nman, kasi nga crush ka nia haha... then we were just laughing.. after the taekwondo lesson he was packing up, eh magkahiwalay ung bag nmen so we didnt really talk... then when i was about to go, i decided to 'read the bulletin board', which was just by the door... or in klev's term, wait for peterpen... so i did... he was about to leave but when he saw me he decided to 'read the bulletin board' as well... in klev's term, wait for me too... although nandon na si erpats sa labas naghihintay sknya, nkipag usap pren siya skn... then sabay kami lumabas ng pinto.. pero nakita ko si dad papalapit so humiwalay na ako sakanya... kahit na malayo na ako, sumigaw paren siya "seeyah klev!" so ako nman xmpre nag bye ren ako... nung nasa car na ako, nakita ko siya nakatingin saken... then kumaway siya saken at nag bye.... haiii.... sobrang naguguluhan na talaga ako sakanya.. di ko lam kung ano ba tlg dapat kong isipin.. parang lahat nung sinabi nia, about his crush and all that crap, ay kasinungalingan... parang pinagseselos nia ako.. ewan ko ba.. lahat ng ginagawa nia kelangan ko pang i-analise ng mabuti upang lubusang maunawaan ang nais niyang iparating... (?_?)
and because of what happened last night, nag-increase nnman ang hope level ko kahit papano... as a result, mejo naging hyper ako ngyong araw na ito.. "you're such a giggler today" sabi ng mga classmates ko... hehe (^^,) tpos ung discussion pa nmen about sa mga teachers na naka-thong! hahaha!! makes me laugh!
...this is my secret
